Best Holiday/Christmas Gift Idea

After all of that holiday shopping, isn't it time you bought a little something for yourself? How about something that's reasonably priced, something that will definitely bring a smile to your face, and something that you can also get for a friend?

Did you know that you can buy a Kindle book for a friend on the Amazon.com website?
And did you know that for a little while, Breakup Cocktail was Number 3 on the Amazon Humor Bestseller List? Combine the two and you have the ideal holiday gift for a friend and also for yourself. The Breakup Cocktail book. Guaranteed to make you smile.

Breakup Cocktail on Kindle or in paperback is a great holiday gift; something to whisk away the tiredness of the holiday season. A holiday stress remover.

 You only need to read a couple of pages and you will find yourself smiling. To buy the Kindle or paperback edition click here and once you are on the page, you can either "Buy Now With One Click" or below that, "Click to Give As Gift," for that lucky friend of yours!

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He's reaching for his credit card

 

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She's off to get her laptop!

Don't Have Fun Without Me!!!

"Where do you draw the line between letting your partner live their life and wondering if they are having too much fun without you?" Excerpt from Breakup Cocktail: 5 Parts Humor, 1 Part Healing and a Twist of Revenge© 2012 Barbara Kingsley Singer. All rights reserved. See the book http://amzn.to/106FCdM

When we are having fun, we want to share that experience with other people. When others are having fun and we are not, we feel left out, sorry for ourselves and perhaps hurt because we weren’t allowed to join in. But it’s so much worse when our partner is having fun and we were not invited.

Of course you have to let your partner have their own life, as well as a life with you, but when they’re going out without you and all you have to look forward to are Downton Abbey reruns and a box of grey, expired chocolates, you will be jealous of the fun you think that they are going to be having.

 You may even hope that they have a terrible time, or at least a boring time. You hope that they think of you half a dozen times while they are out, having a bland and tedious evening. This is all a bit selfish, but we are all selfish creatures and we can’t help ourselves. The trick is not to let anyone else know how you are feeling, except of course your best friend Ann, who you will probably spend half the night on the phone with.

Here are some things you should NOT do:
As your partner leaves to go out for the evening without you, whisper in their ear, “Goodbye my love. I hope you don’t have any fun without me.”

You threaten them with, “If you look at another man/woman and I find out, you’ll be sleeping in the bathroom tonight.”

Wait one hour to see if they come back because they couldn’t spend another minute without you, and if they don’t—get the locks changed.
And,
When they arrive back home, you should NOT sniff them to see if you can smell perfume or cologne on them (or at least don’t make it obvious that you are checking...) or search their hair or clothes for blanket fluffs or carpet dust.

 Just greet them at the door, make them feel welcome, then tell them you have plans next week that don’t include them. That’s fighting fire with fire!

For funny breakup reads (that are MUCH funnier than this blog) sample Breakup Cocktail: 5 Parts Laughter, 1 Part Healing and a Twist of Revenge© a book by Barbara Kingsley Singer. Click here http://amzn.to/106FCdM to take a sip on amazon.com..mmm

But whatever you do, have fun!

Moving into Someone Else’s World

“People who are drawn into spending 90 percent of their time in their partner’s world and only 10 percent in their own, sometimes begin to resemble their better halves, but luckily not in the same way that some dog owners begin to look like their dogs. 

 Sadly, people who live too close to someone else can easily become an opposite-sex version of their significant other, and it has nothing to do with either steroids or hormones.”

Quotes from Breakup Cocktail (Sally’s tale) “Time Travel: Going Back 10 Years to Find Where I Left Myself.”

When you are in a relationship you visit each other’s worlds—you meet his friends and family and he meets yours. You step into each other’s worlds for while, and then you go back to your own. But sometimes you try it on and it seems a better fit than yours; everyone is nice to you (perhaps for a change) so after you step inside, you don’t want to come out again and face your empty apartment, annoying parents or demanding friends again. 

Life with Mr. New is addictive and exciting and maybe, like Sally, you move away with him and leave everything familiar behind.

Here’s another snippet from Sally’s tale: “To Sally, everything had become easier because most of the decisions in her life were now being made by Nick and she willingly went along with them. All she had to do was get up in the morning and follow orders. It was similar to being in the armed forces, but without the marching and the ugly camouflage clothing.” Being with someone can make your life easier, more pleasant, different and exciting and as long as the relationship moves forward and things go well, you feel that you have made a good decision.

“Nick’s family and friends lived a few miles away from their log cabin, and Sally became very attached to his family, his friends, and those friends’ girlfriends and children. The move into Nick’s world was like walking over black ice that was hidden by a soft snowfall, and she fell right into it.”

But what happens if that new world suddenly closes its gates to you? Sally wasn’t expecting to be shut out of Nick’s world – but one day, the unthinkable did happen.

To read Sally’s story and 60 others, go to Amazon.com for the Kindle or paperback version of Breakup Cocktail: 5 Parts Laughter, 1 Part Healing and a Twist of Revenge. Click here to see

“Do I want to get my boyfriend/girlfriend back?”

Getting Back Together After the Breakup
“It works for movie stars—marry, divorce, and then marry that same person again. Everyone’s heard of someone this applies to. Why shouldn’t it work for you?” Quote from Breakup Cocktail, a story entitled “Reunited, Giving It Another Try: and on the seventh day they rested - the Tale of Jasmine and Jerome.”

“How do I get my boyfriend/girlfriend back?” Who hasn’t spent a lot of time and energy trying to figure this one out? We talk to our friends, we lament, we cry, we pray and we hope—and we look for the perfect way to achieve this. But is this really what’s best for us?
I had a boyfriend I went back with after we broke up. We had been apart for a few weeks and I still loved him very much. It’s not that we didn’t get along; things had become too routine and we were getting bored with each other, and gradually became more interested in other people. So we broke up.
When we reunited it was so perfect—we still loved each other. It was like the initial week that we first met, except we already knew what the other one liked and what got on each other’s nerves. This utopia lasted around two weeks, and at the end of that time we were more bored with each other than we ever had been.

The relationship has worn itself out. Looking a little ashamed, we agreed with a smile and a final fling in the bed, that it would be over as soon as we got dressed again. I still think fondly of him from time to time, even though it was years ago.

Of course people break up for a multitude of reasons, but if one person has done something unforgivable to the other one, if you get back together again, it will never be the same as it was before. There will always be mistrust or some resentment that won’t go away. Or if your relationship, like mine, has become stale and boring, it’s unlikely that it will change.
Sometimes people in a relationship make a mistake and jump into bed with Angus from the dry cleaners or Sadie at the library, and after a fling they realize that they want their true love back, because sex is sex and love is—well, love. And yes, the relationship may be able to carry on like before when trust can be rebuilt and forgiveness handed out.

But don’t confuse a break with a breakup. If, after a while, they don’t return your phone calls, or if they put off meeting you, they are stalling because they don’t want to see you. Sometimes people use delay tactics because it’s too difficult for them to make a clean break and hurt your feelings. Or on the other hand they may be unkind to you when you call and you can’t figure out why. It’s like a slow rip of the Band Aid. But don’t accept this treatment. Make a clean break. Say goodbye. Prolonging the agony is exactly that—extended heartache.
I have covered topics like these in the Breakup Cocktail book, where I tell stories of my own breakups and recovery and find some humor in them. I know you will too. Here is the link to the Kindle and the paperback books on Amazon.com click here

Free Kindle days will be October 16, 2013 and October 17, 2013.

THE TOP 10 LIST OF: Ways to Stop Depression ~ Positive Thinking ~ Ways to Make Yourself Happy ~ and Things To Cheer Yourself Up!

“Peeling off the layers of an onion can make us cry. It’s a pity there isn’t a vegetable to peel that would make us laugh.”

Quote from Breakup Cocktail book. Link to paperback edition  http://amzn.to/106FCdM  or Kindle http://amzn.to/1fdNrIX

HERE'S THE TOP TEN LIST~

                                                                                                

1.  Go out alone somewhere where you have never been before – it will change your focus and brighten your outlook. 

It may even inspire you and give you confidence.

2.  Don’t torture yourself thinking about things that cannot be changed – try to distract yourself by thinking about other things, planning the future or a future event, no matter how small. Or just read a magazine or watch T.V.

3.  Don’t make yourself crazy by craving things you cannot have – often, if you are lucky enough to get them, you’ll once again be wanting something else. Human nature is to keep on wanting things. So have realistic expectations.

                              

4.  Never waste one single day of your life encouraging 
sadness and allowing yourself to get depressed –
recognize moments of sadness and turn your back on them.
Try to make the best of this day, it will never come around again.

5.  Don’t count on others to make you happy –
do something nice for yourself every day,
no matter how small.

6.  Name five things that you have that other people might wish they had.

Name another five things that you have, that you would hate to be without – then be glad that you still have them!

                                                                     
7.  Allow yourself uninterrupted sleep at night without worry –
you deserve a good night’s sleep despite worry or guilt. We all do.

8.  Write down good things when they happen so that you can look back on them at a later date – if you are sad or depressed pick up the book or file that you wrote your happy events or thoughts in, and read them. Life won’t seem so bad and you will become distracted and calm.

9.  The brain has no sense of humor --
It reinforces and strengthens our negative thoughts.
To get out of this slump and to

fool your brain into thinking you are happy again (or confident, or healed, or whatever you want to be), write down some positive and encouraging thoughts and read them every day. At the moment you may not believe they can ever be true, but if you get used to seeing those good things, you trick your brain into thinking that they could be true, and you are part way there in making them happen.

10.  Try to build one good memory a day – memories are a big part of our lives, so make them good ones!

 and here's an extra one: To make you smile, laugh and to give you little snippets of advice, read Breakup Cocktail in book format Click here or Kindle format Click here for Kindle
And for you wonderful British people: in book format U.K. book format and on Kindle U.K. Kindle format